August 19, 2005
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"Hit me, I can take your cheap shots." -Jimmy Eat World-
Know what's a terrible feeling? When you're in an argument with someone & you feel so strongly about the other person's being so ridiculously wrong that you can't even see straight. You want to smack them upside the head for being so stupid & immature & selfish, & you're so angry you can't even think of them without smoke coming out of your ears.
Or when you dislike someone intensely, but it's someone who matters to the person who matters most to you. When you try to like them for the other person's sake, but you just can't, because they keep dicking you over & no one else even sees it.
Or when you cry so hard you can barely stand up, & you know you've lost the trust of someone whose trust matters the most, & no matter what they say, you can't stop beating yourself up about it because, really, how could you do such a thing?
And in the end it all comes down to trust, doesn't it? Trusting your friends not to turn on you; trusting them to believe in you when nasty rumors spread; trusting yourself not to revert to your old ways.
This is so cryptic, I know.
Let's just say it's about time for summer to end. Everyone is cranky & irritable & only looking out for number one, and it's starting to show very clearly. I'd forgotten how ridiculously dramatic home can actually be.
Comments (12)
#3, is the worst feeling in the world....
Call me. We need to catch up.
What the hell happened? I really want to hang out with you one on one sometime, just to catch up. The only time I talk to you anymore is when we all go out (not that that's a bad thing). I know it's hard dividing your time between Kevin (who I was already subscribed to
) and work, and just being social in general... but if you ever have a dull moment, I'd really like to just talk and have you over to see my new apt. Later babe...
smoking pot
whats going on
I understand how you feel. I've felt that way before.
<3. don't worry about it. i'll pop a cap in someone's ass if you need it.
Thanks for keeping my mom in your prayers, she is now home and they didn't find anything! She told me about meeting you at the concert, and you just seem so fun, Hee hEE, thanks again, -Valerie-
*I don't know what is goin on, but all I know is something happend last night and everytime I asked what was wrong, no one would tell me, so I gave up. I'm sorry you were upset and I hope this isn't in reference to me, but I tried... really I did. Hope everything is okay. If you need to talk... HOLLER!!*
*hey*
i'm ready for summer to end too. i know the drama of home, only it's likely in a different way then you. but just the same, it's drama. if you need to talk, you know how to find me. we need to catch up sometime when you're free for a few minutes! >hugs<
I know those feelings well. I'm sorry you have to deal with them. Good luck with working things out with whoever it might be that is making you feel this way.
I know exactly how you feel. I've been there. If you need anyone, feel free to e-mail me. I want you to share the stories! <3 Sam
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